elissa fatet l3ionak.com senen

Thinkin about some thots.

Feeling a very large feeling. Something to do with what Iapos;m going to do with my future.
I was thinking before about going to London. I donapos;t know why, I guess I think of London on some level as the rockapos;napos;roll capitol of the world, and kind of different from New York. I think I just want to get away and, like, be somewhere completely unfamiliar on my own terms. Jordan is kinda neat but itapos;s not on my own terms, I really feel like thatapos;s part of the experience, being on my own terms.

Thinking about the band, and Jean. I think itapos;s going to be a problem that Jeanapos;s hanging on this band to be successful, and in a way thatapos;s very much up to me as the main creative force... Well I guess if we played the same songs forever thatapos;d be fine. I guess itapos;s not really up to me. But I feel like Iapos;m going to have to leave her behind at some point or something. Especially with this whole apos;on my own termsapos; thing.

I donapos;t really like the way I look right now. I look like Iapos;m really tired, almost sick. Iapos;ve got this sore on the side of my mouth.

I want to jam Carolyn, I hope I can do that when I get home.

My life is really small, and coming here and realizing exactly whatapos;s involved in flying to another country, itapos;s much less than I thought, I guess.
Itapos;s sort of making me nervous to think that the next thing Iapos;m going to have to do is travel somewhere else, and find a place to stay, and stay there for a while, on my own terms. Iapos;m also going to have to get a job when I get back to Brighton.
I feel like a lot of my intimidation feelings are based on whether I decide to feel intimidated by something, like whatever is the biggest, most intimidating thing happening, I will make a big deal out of.
Especially the job thing. I donapos;t really want to go back to work at Granite, but I donapos;t really want to go back to work anywhere. That might be the problem.

I donapos;t know if recording local bands is going to make me satisfied. I donapos;t know whatapos;s going to satisfy me. Something sort of "large," somehow. I donapos;t know what constitutes "largeness," I need to figure that out.
I donapos;t know if it means global success, or global fame, or just something that has a global effect that i had something to do with. The only way I can imagine this large ambition embodying itself is through covering a large geographical area.
Also I think that Jenna whatshername from the Office, Iapos;ve seen her in two different movies the past few nights and sheapos;s really fcking cute. I know sheapos;s just playing characters, but...
Thereapos;s a lot of people out there, and I just should keep waiting rather than feeling pressured to get with somebody.

crossfire car price, elissa fatet l3ionak.com senen.